Thursday, July 2, 2009

The Enchanted

My flute practically plays itself. From the lowest to very near the highest notes, I can hit them effortlessly, and my fingers easily remember the tunes I played over and over again as a child. Why, I could even get back into business!. A Jazz band perhaps? Hmm

A flute is not a versatile instrument. It will always be soft, nice, friendly. It can do sad or happy and all the range of emotions, and some can make it have a fairy flute conversation, but it can't do, say, loud angry rock, unless you do very weird things with it, that maybe you shouldn't.

It never does loud unless your playing in your apartment after 10pm, like I just did. In an orchestra, the flutes are always miked, and it's still hard to hear them against all the other winds and strings. Flutes just do their little twirly-fluty things out on their own, and their very happy like that thank you very much.

So what does a maverick coyote of the south-west like me do with a flute? I know how to play it, that's one. And I had a sad history with flutes that I just re-wrote when I put my paws on this one. Now the story is, I have my flute and I can play it too. That's two. And the third reason is, it blows! hehe.

Its satisfying to use your breath to make sound. I don't think that sound will ever be as big as I need it to be, but I have a synth for that. I'm gonna stick to the pretty fairy flute sound, and explore it's range. What I love the most about it is it's aerial quality. When you can give your own signing voice the same aerial quality as a flute, that's Big. And if I could program that same aerial quality into my synth, that would be... portable! Fun to be had.

Of course I need to learn to use that keyboard. But It is not portable. It will have to wait for the fall.

I am almost in Amsterdam, life has shifted gears and I like it.

Amourx

Tara

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Toot toot!

I have just returned from a wonderful, FUN, vacation in Florida that had everything it could, almost. Now I'm home and psyched! There is so much stuff that I want to jump on and do, even if my old bones are protesting. But the first thing (well after coffee, facebook, and a few glimpses at the state of my general data) is to come right here and Write. Aaaaaah, feels good.

As you may have guessed I am Happy and even Perky. Yes yes. And a rarity, I have a tan :-). Sun=Fun. I've had few vacations or trips have that effect on me. Maybe 6, let's say (Windermere as a child in the 80's and last year - well last year was Banff and Calgary, but it's the same, Rome, Chicago, Amsterdam this last spring, Florida).

I'm going to Amsterdam, then Windermere, in the next couple weeks. Did I say perky?

Now I have to be diligent cause I'm leaving again in 5 days. I am one month short of missing out on a 6500$ financial aid application deadline!!! Woah Nelly, I gotta screw my head on right and shift to the right gear. Giddy up!

That will help balance my books if you know what I mean, they're sightly bursting at the seams. A good citizen I am, helping with the economy and such. I also have to retrieve 8 months of expense account and medical insurance claims. This too shall help.

I left my weight where I dropped it - yeah baby. And that vitamin D is doing good things to me, I know it.

Now I want to Tazmanian Devil style fix up my place, start working on my novel, visit my family, host a party, gear up my keyboard and play it, rollerblade, budgetize, shrink up and get body care and training for my few rusty bits.

Did I say that I bought a flute? A flute that I can play? Yes yes yes yes YES! I will toot that flute it until I get dizzy. Ha!

I got some Anthropology clothes, of course. And a neat manicure-pedicure at the airport. I still. want. stuff. (Like that thousand dollar solution to all my music needs that really is an economy when you think of it. Really ;-). And Rollerblades. And a four hands massage...)

On that note I am off to doing some of the above in a random order, with a lot of day dreaming and wondering thrown in for good measure.

Amourx.

Tara

Monday, June 22, 2009

South-West Goes South

Calore. Plus qu'une journée et c'est un départ incertain vers Burlington, direction motel cochon. Je serai au volant. Après je vol vers la Floride - j'y suis jamais allée. Ça sera intéressant de rencontrer la mère de l'autre, un sacré personnage à ce que j'ai compris il y a longtemps. Hé au pire, on se sauvera. Au mieux, ça sera drôle.

I (can't wait to) feel good! (ta-da-ta-da-ta-da-ta, I know that I will).

Amourx.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Simple et bon

Il y a des frustrations que j'aime avoir dans mon sac. Je suis une écrivaine frustrée. J'en gagne pas ma vie, mais je suis heureuse d'écrire tout le temps. Je suis une anthropologue frustrée. J'en gagne pas ma vie, mais quand je vois un terrain, je me dis merde! Quelle occasion que je ne peux pas prendre! Parce que je fais autre chose. Je suis une productrice, je suis heureuse.

St-Henri m'apporte beaucoup de ces moments. J'ose même pas vous dire ce qui se trame comme projet parce que je protège déjà mes droits d'auteurs. Mais c'est facile! Chaque porte sur la rue est une histoire. Il y a une mixité de terrain si près les uns des autres... Comment s'organisent les gens ici? Chacun avec leurs origines, leurs religions établies côte-à-côte dans des église à rabais qui côtoient les dolorama et autre 'Regratier'... Chacun avec leurs époques aussi, décelable dans la coiffure qui rappèle parfois la mode de quelques décénies passées. Fixée à l'os dans le spray net.

L'histoire ici est dense. La mienne s'écrirait toute seule. Il y a tellement de matière. Il y a Florentine, ma mère, ma grand-mère... Elles allaient toutes chez John j'en suis certaine. Moi aussi j'y vais de temps en temps.

C'est comme si j'étais tombé dans de la soupe anthropologique toute pleine de sens qui me rappèle pourquoi je suis ancrée aussi solidement ici. Pourquoi je suis heureuse, et pourquoi c'est simple et bon.

Aujourd'hui je suis heureuse, car c'est dimanche et il faut bon. Au programme: lecture, café, ménage, baggage. Mon périple estival commence: Base 1, la Floride. Je m'en vais rencontrer Rose-Ange.

Amourx.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

18 raisons

J'ai triché avec une mangue. C'est une tricherie parfaite, je vous le jure!

Je suis quand même pas mal stressée dans la vie. Je l'écris en français par effort de simplicité... Si je mettait un peu de rationalité dans mes émotions, si je coupais dedans à grand coup de rations, j'arriverais peut-être à saisir ce qui me dérange si intangiblement.

En français tous les mots sont des erreurs, dixit le correcteur de blogger.

1-SPM
2-1200 calories par jour
3-Fracas fait avec la plante du bureau
4-Peur de l'engagement, peine à décider
5-3 voyages en 6 semaines
6-La vitesse grand v du travail
7-Le BRUIT
8-Le besoin d'être appréciée toujours
9-Le gap entre moi et le monde
10-Mon jupon qui dépasse
11-La peur tout court
12-Le manque de temps
13-Pas de manuel
14-Apprendre d'expérience, pitchée à vif
15-Viser très haut/La perfection souvent
16-Le manque de moyens
17-Les autres, en général
18-Le vide

Liste faite. Je ne me sens pas mieux, peut-être un peu pire. J'ai déjà consommé toutes mes calories - dang! Je boufferais bien juste pour rien.

Pour ne pas faire alarmiste, la balance me dit que j'ai perdu 3% de gras! Yes! C'est ça qui est le plus difficile à faire descendre. Je vous le jure.

Je vais m'imprimer un beau gros calendrier sur mon frigo et mettre dessus un soleil sur les jours en Floride, des montagnes pour les jours dans l'ouest, et je vais attendre que ce soit confirmé avant de mettre des bicylettes ou des moulins sur les autres jours de juillet. Comme ça j'aurai l'esprit en paix, je saurai toujours où je suis, dans le futur (c'est quantique).

J'ai pas aimé aujourd'hui, j'ai pas hâte à demain, je sais pas pourquoi je suis mal.

La vie, elle est belle quand même, bien sur.

Amourx

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Ace

1200 calories may be a bit low for my 5 feet 10 inches. I get light headed, and I think that I'm losing 2 pounds a day - but I'm not checking. It's fun in a way, preparing special, little, meals dictated by a bargain book I picked up at Atwater Metro. No thinking, just going through the motion, like a test.

I've been a 'straight A' head since after I dropped out of high school, and after another false start in college (stop-and-go would be a good nickname for me). Since then I've been wanting, and often getting, nothing but AAAAAAAAz. I'm not sick, I'm not compulsive, nothing like that. I'm just a perfectionist for one half of all things. It feels so good when I get close to it. For the other half of things, I'm completely laid back and sloppy.

I'm going to Florida soon for a week of vacation were I will meet beau's mom that I never met in over 2 years. A Super fun trip mixed with a bit of nervousness. Meeting the in-law, Sun and Fun.

Two other trips back to back straight after that. I am smiling all the way to the back of my head. And you sooo should of been on my bike ride today, I swear.

Amourx
Katéri

Monday, June 15, 2009

Dang

I am still EMOTIONAL.